PRESIDENT CHIMP by Jeremy Schanche

A large ape has seized control of the world’s most powerful nation. The whole world’s gone crazy. Nothing will ever be the same again. 

PRESIDENT CHIMP might be called ‘surreal’ if it wasn’t for its indisputable realism and historical accuracy. That’s right readers, the events described in this book would challenge your beliefs about everyday reality and what can happen, if it weren’t for the fact that it’s all virtually true and in reality we actually are – at time of publication – held fast within the hairy and barely prehensile grip of a large and belligerent ape.

These facts, painful as they are, must be faced and this new satire by Jeremy Schanche faces them with relish and abandon, joyfully exposing the fetid and dysfunctional zoo that is today’s White House.

In today’s political world, fact and fiction are hard to distinguish and the events in this story are only subtly different from those accepted as historically true. Join Donald Chimp and his crazy cast of co-stars in this hilarious, razor-sharp portrait of the 45^th President of the USA.

Meet Jefferson Cess, the possum-like Attorney General who hails from Alabamy.

Meet Mike Pynchpenny, the glacial Vice President whose wife makes the tastiest little old cookies this side of Pittsburgh. And don’t forget to say hi to Beth DeVo, the simpering Detroit Poodle whose enjoys sinking her claws into public education. But you’d better watch out for CIA-boss Mikey Pompey - he’ll have his stiletto in your back before you know what’s happening.

The book contains two other stories:

More of Everything is the tale of someone whose attempt to enrich his life goes horribly wrong. Someone who is forced to ask himself ‘at what point does enough become too much?’ Perhaps you’ve been there yourself? If not, now’s your chance.

Into The Thunderbolt Land follows the journey of an English soldier during the 1904 British Invasion of Tibet. Under official instructions to gather information on Tibetan culture, the Somerset Vicar’s son enters a world of meditation, yoga and a profound philosophy that seems to go to the very heart of the riddle that is life.

How did a large ape take over the world’s most powerful nation? How did international power-politics get reduced to an absurdist melodrama? Why did the people of the USA accept the presidency of a bad-tempered chimpanzee? The answer to these riddles will be found in the brand-new ebook by Jeremy Schanche - President Chimp. The author’s second book, this new collection of surrealism, satire and the spirit goes out of its way to ‘drain the swamp’ of Washington politics and reveal the uncensored reality of today’s White House under President Donald Chimp.

Jeremy Schanche is also the author of The Horned Whale or An Morvil Kornek. Published in 2016, it includes the Gothic novel The Kramvil, plus two short stories, a collection of poetry and two glossaries.
PRESIDENT CHIMP is available from various ebook sites.  Read it now - "goddam your ass!"

A MESSAGE FROM THE LEADER:
Alright now listen up you bunch of goddam liberal lady-boys! I'm only gonna say this once: If I catch any of youse reading that totally unfunny new book about me I'm gonna personally unleash the savage hogs and and deploy the deeply sinister weapons, got me? 
This so-called 'book' about me is totally fake. Written by a pathetic little attention-seeking anarchist! 
Pathetic.
And fake.
Totally.
I expect this so-called 'writer' has been forgetting to inject his bleach and the 'virus' (which is a Chinese FAKE by the way) has gotten into his brain.
Anyway. When the LIBEL starts, the BIBLE starts, so all you FAKE-NEWS media hacks and so-called 'authors' better look out cause we've got a whole heap of rubber bullets waiting for you - ENEMIES OF THE PEOPLE. 
And if that doesn't work I'll hold a Bible at you! 
This book is really lame.
Pathetic.
And FAKE. Worst satire ever!
Sincerely,

@realDonaldChimp